Every so often, while glancing at The Boy, I get visions of him at a slightly older age, being treated meanly by other kids. Maybe he’s about 3 or 4 and toddling over to try to join in a game, or maybe he’s just quietly watching other kids, and they exclude him. Christ, it just stabs my heart.
And sometimes I imagine someone bullying him. I teach middle and high school, and if we are lucky, the boy will go to school for free where I teach (this won’t happen, but only because of the current school’s policy, not our luck), and I see myself confronting some middle schooler over his behavior. And I try to figure out ways to not get fired… So far, I haven’t really found a good way to do it, as my emotions and anger take the upper hand.
This is a quirk I have: I get into arguments in my head with people and work my way through them and they are almost always quite stupid and petty, but I win them by the end. Often quite impressively.
But I have been thinking about The Boy’s future a little more often as “Bully” has been publicized and debated. I understand more and more the idea that there is nothing more tragic than burying a child. Most of the time, though, happily, I play with The Boy and admire his cuteness and his quick changes and developments and revel in his funniness and personality. Luckily…